I'm disowning blogger, so sorry but this is more of my 'fun' blog. I need to get serious about stuff - thus growing up to http://withoutyouiamjustme.tumblr.com/

Go subsribe, that would be really nice you know? And I'm still a noob so the stuff down the side is all french to me. PUN.

Goodbye blogger, and Jac, you best get tumblr :) My american friend

xxx

A thousand painted eyes.

Bugger.

And that is not aimed at my exam results, they weren't that bad.

Where are the tour dates you promised!?

Lexi got a hair cut.

And he smiles in the video also, what is the world coming to? ;)

http://www.bebo.com/FlashBox.jsp?FlashBoxId=9833890077&MID=3611618708

Weightless

This is what summers all about - at least what it used to be all about. Like a simple cauliflower butterfly gliding along the soft warm haze, I have this feeling that I am weightless. Before everything mattered, every thought, every feeling and every moment - but now that doesn't seem rellevent at all.

I was walking along the country lanes of Colwall this morning, call it old fashioned, but as I walked I took in the beautifully crafted houses and the scenery in the area. Its really nice out there and I don't care if I sound old. Most people will know that someday I aspire to move to New York City, hopefully there I will find my dreams in journalism. But being out there kind of makes me realise that what I really want is right here, but I do understand that certain dreams will not be met either way. Sometimes there isn't a true compromise.

Being bought up in a small town I think this will always shape me to want to quieter side of life, heck, its a fate tempter at following my other ambition of being an author but why am I even talking about the future? Oh, subconcious pretentions pulling through here.

Lately though, I feel like I've had a mask on for the last six months - and someones taken it off. Now my friends, I can see in colour - everythings so sharp and new and I feel incredible. I can't quite think as to what has made this happen but its amazing and everywhere I look seems to have a positive side to it. And my friend's...I don't think I've ever known how wonderful they are :) Cheers guys!

Love for you all, but I love Birdo more ;)

xxx

Oh and screw typos, grammar freak has left the building.

Don't read this.

Why does this bother me so much? Why does it even matter?

It shouldn't. It couldn't. It doesn't...does it?

Not after all of the promises I have made and all the words I've ironed out with care - that should be decleration for why none of this should bother me. But it fucking does. I shouldn't have even deluded myself into thinking that something like that would be possible...

This is a lesson to everyone - never take anything you have for granted because one day it'll be gone and won't come back.

Eat this.

Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.
Mindblank.

...Wut??

Blank

"This charade is never going to last, so pick the poison and pour yourself a glass."

Has anyone else noticed the constant timer above my head? It swings in time with my metronome - every second, every swing - its slowly becoming harder to endure. This time last week sugar did not make me feel sick, not in this way at least. It fueled my smile like cocaine except the high was permenant.

I think I've chosen my poison, and its unbearable. I didn't want to write this blog but the more I think the more I worry and the more I worry the more the poison spreads.

Things used to be so simple, didn't they?